Had to go to a parenting class mandated by court last night. It was a pretty good class, but obviously if they made it optional, nobody would go.
When I came into the room, there was a big slide projected that said “DISILLUSIONMENT: Begins in marriage when the rosy glow of the honeymoon wears off.” That’s cheery, I thought, really sets the tone. There was an armed guard at the class, which also set the tone. Then, a guy got into an increasingly escalated argument when his wife showed up, and he was shouting a lot of horrible insults at her. I was just about to get up and go get the guard when a guy from the back row stood up and yelled at the man that nobody wanted to be here, so let’s just make the best of it and simmer down.
The yelling man then stood up and introduced himself and his “wife” as the instructors for the class. Which also set the tone. This kind of thing is supposed to be funny, but is the sort of reason I don’t like many types of surprises. It’s kind of why I don’t care for going to watch magicians – it’s like the whole time, they are pulling the wool over your eyes and making a fool out of you, and repeatedly go, there you go, see what I did, and you missed it. I don’t find it fascinating or cool, it just pisses me off when people make me feel foolish. Given how uncomfortable people were at the class anyway, as Back Row Dude pointed out, this was certainly a unique way to start the class.
For the next two hours, we were all made to feel like horrible, unlovable people who are ruining their children, and here are some ways that many people do that, so don’t do those things. Or these other things. And don’t bother getting married again, because statistics say that pretty much everyone who does is a failure.
It was a fun evening.
I was very tired when I got home, sipped a glass of rye, paid a few bills. I closed the curtains to the patio and stepped on a wet spot in the carpet; someone spilled something, and my wonderful sitter had done her best to clean it up. She did the dishes, too, which nearly made me cry, just to have someone do something for me like that. She doesn’t have to do things like that and I was so touched. They got all the rest of his homework done (she teaches first grade, which is quite handy), and he got a bath, and actually told her he was too tired for a story and went to bed without complaint when it was time. Mary Poppins, that one. Only much younger. She’s a lovely young woman and we talked for a bit last night before she left about all that’s going on, and new beginnings and such. She and I are going to try to run a race together this summer. I kept thinking that I wished I were a billionaire, I’d have her be my kid’s nanny.